Folksy, trite idioms, one liners, and memes stack the arsenal of democratic candidate Kamala Harris.  Employing some of the president’s own techniques in appealing to swing voters, Harris’ popularity has soared.  Those close to her campaign have intimated that the next debate might include Trump-like catchy disparaging adjectives attached to the top candidates.  Whitey Joe, Senile Sanders, Old Lizzy are a few.

Joe Biden’s staff is preparing to fight back with their own catchy names.  Biden’s chief of staff explained, “Kamala said America wants food on the table and not a food fight, but the best food is Indian.  Let’s go!”  Hindu Harris and Coding Kamala are potential names being debated to expose the truth about Harris’ heritage.  Opposition research has revealed that Harris is a closet vegetarian who likes to watch spelling bees and do math for fun. Her favorite rap star? Punjabi MC.  Biden’s staff is working to create a meme of Harris, dressed of course in Indian-attire.

In contrast to this strategy, Pete Buttigieg has taken a rational approach to politics.  Though several Hollywood celebrities have endorsed him, Buttigieg actually appeals to educated voters.  Unscrupulous attacks are abundantly available to the South Bend Mayor, but to the dismay of the networks, he continues to take the higher ground and focus on issues.  Many disagree with this approach, encouraging him to engage more educated swing voters with slightly higher brow linguistic devices.  Presidential Pete pensively ponders possibilities.