Despite coronavirus, Easter is still coming April 12. What America does to celebrate this day is troubling the normally spirited Easter Bunny. With ears sagging from weight of this crisis, he mulls over the options. In an exclusive interview, he describes his plight, “I thought I was dreaming when the president said that he wanted America back for Easter. Then I realized it was a real live nightmare. There is no way that is going to be safe, according to any of my pandemic models or simulations. I asked Dr. Fauci, ‘what’s up doc?’, and he gave me the real data. I’m just going to have to wash each egg for 20 mins each. I think with help from all my peeps, I can do this.”